Jesus is My Homeboy...No Really He is.

      I am probably about to displease quite of few people with this post, but I want to speak the truth..and to be frank I am only worried about pleasing my Savior now. Recently my eyes have been opened to the playful, funny, human side of God and who he created his son Jesus Christ to be...and I may be alone in this, but I have never really felt like this is a concept that is openly and frequently talked about. What we do hear so often from Christians is how much we love our Lord, and I truly have encountered some beautiful people who genuinely adore Christ.. but the factor that these hearts have coincides with truly taking the time to learn the character of Jesus. Jesus came to earth to reveal God to us, he is the heart of God, they are one. Learning the character and personality of this man is not only interesting, it is essential in a solid relationship with him. I feel like the incorrect prioritization of religion and tradition over an intimate relationship and friendship with Christ has deceived us into believing that he is this far-off, judgemental, strict, being that we only call upon in case of an emergency or on specific holidays involving a bunny or a tree..catch my drift?
         The bible provides us with so many interactions with Jesus, and if we take the time to interpret his communication and the way he chooses to respond, a personality begins to make itself apparent to us, and not only that, but one we can relate to. After all, we were created in his image. One of my favorite stories is found in the book of John, and takes place a week or so after Jesus is resurrected from the tomb. His disciples decided to go fishing, and early in the morning Jesus stood on the shore watching them. His disciples did not recognize him because as I can imagine he didnt try to draw much attention to himself or create some big spectacle...not like he had just risen from the dead or anything hahah, anyways he simply called out to them, "Friends, catch anything yet?" They answered no, and he said, "Throw your net to the right side of the boat and you will find some."  When they did, they were unable to haul the net in because of the overload of fish...thats when it all clicked, "Thats our Lord!!!" Then Jesus told them to bring the fish they caught and have some breakfast. Why do I love this story? Notice how casually Jesus enters the scene, his best friends dont even know its him. This is the resurrected Lord, mind you..ruler of the heavens and earth. This was a HUGE moment, one many people doubted would happen. He could have commanded the attention of the entire world emerging from a firey volcano or something! We all know that in our generation superstars use almost any shock and awe tactic to get noticed. But no, Jesus was a simple man. A humble man. Human. And the man just wanted to have some breakfast with his buddies. Gotta love it.
       Jesus is real, and to experience a friendship with him is a true gift and every human being can experience it. Jesus is so much more than this two-dimensional figure that people believe him to be. Yes, he is loving and compassioante, but he is so much more than just that. I challenge myself and all of you to try and cultivate a genuine friendship with Him and to recognize his playful side..that is the beauty of Christianity..there are always new depths and layers to discover, and this one is so much fun.

Love you all,
Lys.
      

Fear of Embrace the Unknown.

 

 

 

 

        Okay, so it happened. The inevitable realization. The first break down. It hit me like a ton of bricks. This morning I woke up at about 3:00am unable to convince myself that sleep was much more appetizing than the combustion of thoughts swirling around in my head like a typhoon. After surrendering to the typhoon, and coming to the conclusion that I had already mustered up the maximum amount of sleep that my brain would allow me, I walked down stairs, made a cup of coffee, and stared straight ahead at the wall. As my eyes made their way gradually around my living room, I started to take in the familiarity. All of the stupid little nothings that when combined together somehow made up a superficial comforting feeling of security and mundane relief. As embarrassed as I am to admit, this is what broke me. Since I have began to prepare for my future endeavors I have been drilled with advice, stories, counsel, warnings, cautions, encouragement, instruction, support, prayer, and so many words from the mouths of others. Some that have terrified me, some that have inspired me, and some that have offended me, but none that have broken me. I guess it just all caught up with me this morning, and I truly allowed it all to sink in.

                I am well aware that this adventure that I am about to embark on is a blessing and I still can’t even wrap my mind around how someone like me deserves to have this opportunity, but I have got to admit, the fear of the unknown had snuck up on me. I was scared of the fact that I have NO idea what is about to happen in the 6 months I am gone, or what is going to happen when I come back, or if I come back, or which country I will be living in for 3 months, or who I will meet, or where God will lead my current relationship, or if I will get sick, or depressed, or scared…????? These thoughts attacked my mind all at once, and of course my flesh was shaken, because I allowed the enemy to have a strong hold. But because my God taught me not to shrink back, I fought back the only way I knew how, His word.

             I opened right to Isaiah and frantically flipped through the fragile pages of my bible and my eyes were drawn right to chapter 41 starting with verse 8. As I read I could feel my spirit delighting and my mental wounds physically being tended to…these are the words that I read.

 

“But you, Israel, my servant, Jacob, whom I have chosen, you descendants of Abraham my friend.. I took you from the ends of the earth ,from its farthest corners I called you. I said, “You are my servant” I have chosen you and have not rejected you. So do not fear, for I am with you, do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”

Isaiah 41:8-10

 

 

   Wow. Speechless. How can I even lack confidence in such an immeasureable God? Of course we are human, and we are imperfect beings, but if I am constantly devoted to diving into His word and trusting it whole heartedly..these little doubts wouldnt have such a strong hold on me. I am such a constant work in progress, but with progression He brings insight. This I am learning. I wrote down a prayer in my journal last week that actually made me laugh out loud. The main idea of the prayer was that my spoken "Thank You's" served almost no justice for the blessings He has poured over my life..so I was praying to have the Lord help me live out my "thank you" and to guide me to make my life a display of my gratitude..but there is the irony...even in the thanks that I try to scrounge up with my life..I still need Him. What a revelation, I even need Him in my thank you.

 

   At this point I am talking in imperfect circles but the point I am trying to display is this..Fear is very real, and can consume us if we let it, but the beauty of this vicious cycle is that we werent created to take on all of this fear all by ourselves. We were made to NEED Him. He delights in being needed. So if you are like me, and one little worry can snow ball into your entire world crumbling in an instant...just remember that He wants to be the hand to console you in this time..so let Him. Scream, yell, kick, get angry, let it out, express those fears, be real with Him, allow His word and His presence to alleviate all of those torn up places of your soul. Team up with your maker to take on the attacker and embrace these unfamiliar uncomfortable feelings. Sure its messy, heck yea it hurts. But how incredibly worth it.

 

 

 

Psalm 55:22

 

Love you all, Lys

 

 





Free.

What does it mean to be free?

            I hear this word. I love this word. I even have this word permanently imprinted on my rib cage…but what does it really mean? I feel liberation in physical form just simply placing the word between, “I am” and “from”, but that’s where it gets me. I am free from what? Until I can answer this question, am I really all that free? Have I ever really taken the time to justify the use of this word that I habitually flaunt?

            What I do know is that the foundation of this word comes from the place that our souls rest, and that the spark which ignites this word to come to life can only be lit by the hands of God. Only He can breathe definition off of the pages and into real life.

            2 Corinthians 3 says, “Where the spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom.”  Let’s take a closer look at that solemn word. Freedom: the state of being free rather than in confinement or under physical restraint; Example: He won his freedom after the trial. The irony of this word is that freedom does not come freely. Somebody must pay a price for this latitude. The first thing I must allow to sink in is that I was fought for. 1 Corinthians 6 says it best, “You were bought at a price.” The reason that we can mess up, and make our own choices, and be welcomed back with open arms, is because Jesus went before us and paid a brutal cost so that we can delight in this angelic word. Let that sink in. Now I ask myself, because Jesus fiercely paid a price for my life, what am I free from?

           

I am free from….

            The way that people perceive me,

I am free from….

            Believing lies that diminish my value,

I am free from….

            Misery, Shame, Guilt,

I am free from….

            The ways of the world,

I am free from….

            Measuring up,

I am free from….

            Comparison,

I am free from….

            Thinking that it is all about me,

I am free from….

            Depression,

I am free from….

            My past

I am free from….

            Spending eternity in hell.

                                                                        I am free.

 

 

Lys.

You are Worthy of a Love so Sacred.

As I continue on my beautiful journey with the Lord, I am finding a rhythm in my recollections. The way that the Lord chooses to reveal my answered prayers to me are almost like an unforeseen puzzle. He loves to use people, places, and things, that we would NEVER see coming. Sometimes I don’t even realize that the very thing he unfolded in front of me is the very thing that I asked for. Almost every time I go back and read my journal, I am moved to tears at the way our Creator orchestrates his miracles, it is indescribable and eminent.

I recently skimmed a previous entry from one of my journals from the beginning of this month. On this particular page I was just pouring out my heart and holding nothing back. This was my hearts cry, and it was heavy and raw. The essential point of the flowing ink revealed that I was struggling with accepting Gods love. Yep. I know. A fundamental aspect of being in a relationship with Christ, the easiest gift in the world to accept, the most rewarding powerful state of mind a human being can live in, and I just could not allow myself to receive it. I was in my own way, and my relationship with Christ was suffering. Towards the end of my journal entry I was just spitting out truth and how I knew what the word of God said was real, but there is a huge difference between “knowing” the truth and “accepting”  it. The final sentence stated, “I must push forward and press into you Lord, because I know in my heart that there is a season coming where I will not only hear about your truth, and learn about it, but I will put it into practice, and see it unfolding in my life.

I grow frustrated just reading that.  It is amazing how we get in our own way sometimes. We simply cannot live in the truth without allowing it to penetrate our hearts, and that means..Believing and living in that solidity that HE LOVES US. I know I am not the only person to struggle with this concept, but I can’t lie, it sure as heck feels like that sometimes. As sad as it is, the enemy had convinced me that I was unworthy of a love so selfless, that I did not deserve for someone to see me so pure and blameless, he had convinced me that I was damaged goods. Living in this lie, almost destroyed my life. Once this prayer was purged, I knew that the season that my heart longed for was not going to be an easy one and I did not expect it so soon, but guess what…he delivered.

In the most random sequence of events, my sweet Jesus has used people in my life who I would have never expected to show me corporeal examples of this kind of love. I am learning to receive and accept that this selfless love that I am being shown is only a “glimpse” of the way that my Heavenly Father loves me. I am learning that these lessons of love come in packages that we don’t plan for, but if we take the time to unwrap them and look with eyes of the spirit, we see Him. I am learning how important it is to seek Him in a way that is all my own, and not to miss out on his adept messages of love, and to believe that I am worthy of this love, this benevolent, divine, freely given love.


Isaiah 43:4 says, " Since you are precious and honored in my sight and because I love you, I will give people in exchange for you, nations in exchange for your life."

Love you all, Lys